Staying Home with Family

Written by Meg

Unplugging on Sundays gives us space. Space to breathe, to be together, to exhale. I feel like life is so hectic and switching off slows it down. Sometimes we get out for a hike (us kiwis call it a bush walk) or some fishing but often we just stay home.

I love being at home with my honey and my boys. Reading books, cooking and playing games usually take priority. Getting together over a board game we chat and hang out. It's a really great way for the kids to learn how to be good winners and losers. 

Some excellent family games:

•Carcassonne

•Hey That's My Fish 
•Uno 
•Labyrinth 
•Scrabble Jnr

The kids have an hour of quiet time in their rooms after lunch. Mummy and Daddy brew a pot of coffee and have our own game time. We love to play together and switching off lets us make time for that. It's so easy to get sucked into the Internet and for relationships take second place. 

Our favourite two player games:

•Dominion

•Race For The Galaxy 
•Mancala
•San Juan
•Backgammon

Unplugged days at our place often involve something crafty. The boys (5 and 7) both have enjoyed learning to sew this year. Trial and error has taught us that stitching into a heavy fabric like felt is easiest for a beginner.

I sometimes tinker about on my sewing machine but more often than not, I'll potter about and help the kids with whatever they're into. During the week I often have the computer on and I know that they don't get really good quality attention. I often feel a little guilty about that. I'm sure I'm not alone in that.

Cooking from scratch and trying new recipes is a something I like to do too. Recently we tried making pasta and although a little time consuming it was really quite fun. When we're switched off there seems to be more hours in the day.

My mother tells the story of us playing"unhappy families" when I was a girl as our games of "happy families" would inevitably end in tears. There have been plenty of melt downs at our place but these days the kids are a lot better at losing.

I think we used 5 large free range eggs and 500g of flour, mixed them to a dough, kneaded it by hand and then popped it in the fridge for a wee rest. The rolling out part was a two person job (one big, one little) and was a little bit magical.

What are your favorite family games? 

Maybe you'll have a new one that we can try. 

They Will Follow Suit

Written by Kiersten

Raising teenage daughters, I have quickly realized that coercion does not work. I am passionate about parenting and am willing to try new things, read new books and implement changes to our lifestyle that I believe will benefit us. 

When beginning new ideas, or introducing new behavior, I have to be subtle. I have to do it first. They will see me doing things, and they will follow suit. As parents, we are setting patterns for a lifetime.   

I started a blog a few years ago chronicling our new farming project and the beginning years of our home schooling. My mom started reading it. As my blogging became more inclusive I added birth stories from my midwifery practice and documented lots of arts and crafts.

My mom said, recently, “Gosh, Kier, you do all the same things I did while you were growing up! I keep reading about them on your blog.”

 “Like what?” 

“I gardened, I crocheted, and I embroidered. I sewed.”

I just barely remember my mom doing all of these things. If I spend time, consciously thinking about it, I can remember. I have blankets that my mom made. She made them for my daughters too. I remember her doing batik. She embroidered and we always had a garden. I never thought of that. I never realized that I was doing all the things my mom had done. 

She was (and is) an avid reader. So am I, so are my daughters. 

It reminded me that our children will do what they have seen us doing throughout their childhood. 

If you want your children to be unplugged, be unplugged yourself!

Make sure they see you:

• Reading. Have books and magazines around the house.
• Crocheting, knitting or embroidering. Use your hands. Spend time talking to your children while creating something.
• Hiking.  Even if they don’t join you each time, let them see you going for a walk with your partner, or friend every day.  (Or often!)
• Sitting still. Drink tea with each other. Drink tea with your friends. Let this be a normal way for you to spend time together with friends and family. 
• Garden. Grow your own food, or just grow some herbs on your windowsill.

Do the things you want your children to do! 

What are some of the things that you do that you remember your mom or dad doing? 

Bliss and Bravery

Written by Chloe

I'm not too late for confessional, am I? Because our Sundays have been taken over by football. And our evenings have included a lot of television. And both of those have sometimes meant a laptop or smartphone out at the same time. Electronics have outnumbered the people in the room.

The truth is, I have a really hard time with being away from the distraction of media.

We've talked a lot in this space of 'unplugging.' But the difficulty in this is that it requires us to plug in, to completely engage in real life. And engaging in what you really love without distraction is weird. Counter-cultural, even.

When my family is unplugged I have nothing to keep me from facing our reality.

My husband has dreams that are bigger than a 9-to-5 job.

My political views make me uncomfortable with the Big Bank that holds our mortgage.

I often choose to shop a large retailer instead of a mom-n-pop.

I spend a lot more time reading about other people pursuing their goals than I do actually working toward my own.

Unplugging makes me uncomfortable because I long for a life completely different from the one I find myself leading.

“If you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Wherever you are—if you are following your bliss, you are enjoying that refreshment, that life within you, all the time.” -Joseph Campbell

This late fall and early winter, you’ll find me attempting to follow my bliss:

• I am turning off the computer and lowering our grocery budget.
• I am spending less time on blogs and more time in books.
• I am finally reading my camera’s manual.

Those sound so exciting to me. Life is easier in bullet points, I think. But the heart of the matter is that those bullet points are paving the way for the really hard Unplugged Reckoning at our house.

By limiting my aimless online time, I am hoping to work out the logistics of a big move. From the suburbs to a rural lot. From a mortgage with a company I loathe to a very small rent check that we pay to a man who lives in our community. Half of our current square footage. Four times the flexibility in our monthly budget.

This move, one that we already know some of our closest friends and family do not understand, will require me to be the bravest I have ever been. And this bravery has been brought on by unplugging from normal and plugging in to my bliss.

How could taking Unplugged time help you to follow your bliss?

Unplugging... The Old Fashioned Way

Written by Ellen

Unplugging in our home happens on the weekends. 

During the week, our family of five uses the computer quite liberally. My husband, a software engineer, works from home (yay!) Many of my sons’ assignments are on-line programs and my daughter’s reading program is from a website. 

The workweek requires a fast internet connection and enough computers (we have two) to service all five of us. It can be tough to get everyone the time he or she needs. 

On the weekends, rather than work, life happens. 

Our favorite way to unplug involves connecting with our good friends, and happily, new neighbors. We moved to our current home last May and quickly struck up a strong friendship with our “back door” neighbors. 

They have three boys, all close to my children’s ages. Each child pairs up with his or her playmate, or they mix it up. They love to play together, bike to school together, and seek each other out at home or at school.

In fact, our home has become their home, and vice versa, and the children (and often times myself!) will run over for a quick chat (or a cup of sugar).

We adults discovered that we all play bridge. This happy coincidence meant extra playtime for the kids and more together time for the adults. It’s a win-win. 

Since my main way of unplugging on the weekends is to prepare for the week ahead (in the kitchen), it is easy and rewarding to prepare a delicious home-cooked meal for my friends. If I say I’ll do a soup and muffins, they will always show up with wine. It’s that kind of friendship. 

After the kids munch homemade pizza for dinner, we adults settle in to our yummy meal, followed by as many hands of bridge as we can squeeze in. We are only interrupted if the kids need help, which is seldom, since they play so well together.

In fact, we are often treated to a run-by costume parade as the children, deep in their imaginary world, fly by us in search of something. Their made up games take them inside, outside and even into the garage. There is much laughter.

Sometimes we will put a movie on for them and they snuggle up together, wrapped in blankets and surrounded by stuffed animals. We adults continue to deal and bid, play and laugh, drink wine, and enjoy each other.

It is the highlight of our week, and something we try hard to do often. 

This ritual of ours hearkens back to the afternoons I remember from my childhood. Happily reading, nestled in a window seat next to shelves and shelves of books, I remember the clinking of ice in scotch glasses and the snapping of cards - my grandmother’s bridge games. 

My husband remembers it too, from his own childhood. His youth was filled with bridge (for his parents) and playtime with neighbor kids (for him). 

We both cherish the sounds, smells and rituals of our weekly reconnection with our friends. It refreshes and restores us, and reminds us to breathe, and to live. 

Have you found an unplugged moment that takes you back to your childhood? 

Do you think “unplugging” helps us find the moments we have in common with our parents and grandparents?  

Rediscovered Blessings

Written by Jessie

Keeping peace in one’s heart and gratitude in one’s mind while experiencing difficult times can be a challenge. Many families are struggling with hardships and facing sacrifices, and as a result, lifestyles are changing. 

He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.  ~Epictetus

My family has experienced its own recent changes and a great sense of loss settled into our minds. Seeking refuge from worry and confusion, we began to rely on our moments of “unplugged” time for guidance and clarity. These times were a blessing indeed! With a bit of mindfulness and appreciation, we quickly learned that the things we thought we could not live without were not really things, but instead were the tiniest of experiences.

Moments of joy, beauty, and love are sacred to us and, in thanksgiving, are truly cherished. 

Below are just a few of my family’s rediscovered blessings:

• Billowing blankets are a great comfort
• Baking with Grandma creates a deep connection
• Reading by candlelight brings peace
• Sunday dinner reconnects us each week with our (now six person) family
• The sound of the wind in the trees is Mother Earth’s music
• Bubble baths and warmed towels are a joyous event
• Singing along to daddy playing guitar is inspiring
• Family is the backbone of our life; we are strong when we are all together
• Furry friends enrich our lives and provide support
• Books, pens, and crayons are therapeutic and stir our imagination
• Hot chocolate, popped corn and a movie on the laptop are a “getaway”
• A stocked pantry and a full refrigerator gives a sense of security and wellbeing 

We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.  ~Thornton Wilder

Taking a step back to reevaluate what tiny experiences you treasure can open you up to a multitude of blessings you may have overlooked. I encourage you to take a few minutes of your “unplugged time” (preferably with tea in hand and family close) to ask yourself these questions:

Where does my gratitude truly lie?

What things do I cherish?

What experiences are sacred to me?

What simple beauties might I be overlooking that bring joy into my life?